The holidays

have brought with them a weird tingling feel inside of me - I am annoyed. By all those things summer actually: Sun, happiness, love, and all similarly mind-numbing happy-makers that us humans seem to so desperately depend on.
Yes, I am once again in my favorite state of being: alone, pissed off, and eager to vent in writing. So this will be a treat for you cynically-depressed maniacs out there. I cannot for the life of me figure out where this mood comes from though. I mean, I have been alone again for a while now; I haven't had any problems with other people, and am generally not feeling bad per se. So why is this annoyed anger amassing amongst my neuronal axons? I don't know to be honest. I simply don't. All I know is that I sifted through tons of trash and spam mail this morning and came across an old e-mail by my bitch of an ex-girlfriend from a few years ago. And well, this got me curious enough to see if she had still blocked me on Facebook, and well, she has. Which I find funny actually, seeing as she was the one who tore my heart to pieces back then, but somehow felt that I was the one that needing blocking out. 

Anyway. I am not here to rant about some lower life-form crawling around somewhere in the more disgusting parts of Germany. No, I am today going to address the grand topic of why summery weather is annoying as fuck. Don't get me wrong though, I like having it warm and lying down in the sun near a lake with a beer,  but still, the summer always brings along your typical, ever-grinning idiots that cannot seem to find a thing wrong with this fucked up world of ours. At least not when "the sun is shining, man". Fuckers all. It's a trend that has and probably always will be prevalent in some people, and it's always worst during summer. I have had it with those kind of humans always seeing the best in any situation, worsening my usual annoyance with their overly enthusiastic attitude about anything. I mean, I sound like a grumpy asshole right now, but in reality I just want to chill. It's not like I'm running around with a sour face all day and poisoning everyones' good mood. I just cannot stand the fact that people seem to think that things are always that much better in the summer. And I cannot stand the relentless and redundant notion of constantly perpetuating a status of this jolly but ultimately annoying overdrive-happiness that some people exude as soon as the temperatures outside start to rise even the slightest bit. It's just downright stupid if you ask me. I mean of course it's deeply rooted in our evolutionary make-up, seeing as sun means warmth and life, and stands for fertility and prosperity, so it is understandable that sunlight speaks to our primal instincts and therefore compels us to feel more enthusiastic and "alive". But still, aren't we at the top of the food chain because we managed not to succumb to these primitive urges but rather developed a consciousness and a rational mind to think abstractly about situations before entering a thoughtless frenzy of emotion-based dumbness? It seems to me that the same way rose-tainted glasses manage to alter my perception of things when socially intertwined in what is commonly referred to as a "relationship", sunny weather alters the perception of aforementioned people. I mean I can relate to being completely tangled in an emotional net of instinct-driven decisions, but at some point a stop needs to be put to the madness that is emotional thinking and logic needs to return as the prevalent influence on decisions. Without logic, we'd return to a state of dumb beasts, purely living for survival and reproduction. And if we get back to that point we might as well go back to living in the woods and sustaining ourselves by hunting. So please people, keep your emotions aside next time you decide to be happy and think about actual reasons to be besides it being warm outside, which for me simply does not count.

But well. Most people, as do I, do base a lot of everyday decisions on instinct and intuition. And that is not wrong. Per se. It is normal that we don't analyze every step we take, otherwise humanity would still be stuck in the dark ages simply due to the fact that development would have taken forever. But the problem I addressed above refers much more to those decisions and/or feelings that should be analyzed properly before being taken or felt, seeing as their impact is large enough to justify a slow but well thought through decision.

Okay, I am going to be honest with you guys: I have no idea where I'm going with this, and no clue how to go on. So I am not going to go on, and instead switch my focus to a different topic altogether: a lifestyle I have encountered during a sort of job interview I've had recently. I was meeting the guy I am now going to write articles for in a larger city close to the little town I live in, and he decided to take me with him to meet a few producers and artists he works with in order to write a trial article which would be the base for his appraisal of my writing and therefore also for his decision whether to hire me or not. And well, we ended up in an alternative kind of living community, where artists work, live, drink and smoke together. An enthralling experience to say the least. These people represent for me the kind of life I have always been keen on: the life of a drifter, only marginal responsibilities but full dedication to their art and their peers, a harmonious togetherness outside of mainstream society but not entirely cut-off either. They're doing what I've always been preaching: "living without, but working within". All of them have small jobs to pay the bills and make ends meet, but ultimately their life revolves around their passion that is music. I want that. Exactly that. Which is why I am so glad I got the job as a columnist for the guy, seeing as I have now direct access to these people and can get my foot in the door of journalism, meaning that I am one step closer to being able to lead a similar life: focusing on writing and maybe even making music whilst not being held down in the grudges and dogmas of regular society. The feeling elicited by this vibrant community of like-minded people was as gargantuan in deepness as it was in exhilaration. I finally got to see the kind of life and dedication to a passion I had thought lost in this day and age. I cannot stress how fucking authentic these guys were, how damn cool and relaxed their view of the world was, and how they had very similar views on issues I find important. I mean, this is exactly what I have been striving for, it's quite liberating to know that the possibility of leading such a life is very real and not that far out of reach for me anymore. Plus I now have the opportunity to prove myself in the journalistic field to some extent, which makes me really anxious to finally get to writing the next article. These articles I am writing are by the way almost exclusively going to be coverages of parties this guys' organization throws, and all my expenses will be covered, which is nice. But I am actually just happy to get my name out there. That can of course, as most things in life be traced back to the most basic of human needs asides from shelter and food: the need for recognition. I know that, you know that, everyone does. Understandable enough though, isn't it? As I had already ascertained in an earlier post, we all strive for immortality of sorts. And getting a step closer to being able to work as a journalist/columnist, and thereby having hundreds, if not thousands of people read my words, however mundane and formal they may be in the case of my new job (I was told to keep things formal and clean, at least in the articles that is), and that alone already brings me a bit closer to being unforgettable and rooted in peoples' minds for eternity. I like to think that at least my writing will be able to live on when my body slowly crumbles under the sum of accidents and intoxicants that should long ago have killed me; and if that is actually the case at any point in my life, I will gladly embrace death with a laughter that will echo in history. But enough of that. If I talk about this fascinating idea too much it'll become mundane and I risk sounding self-absorbed, which is something I am not and therefore want to avoid coming across as. 
The point I want to make in all this is actually just that I feel like I've finally crossed the first of probably many bridges on my way to establishing myself as an actual wordsmith and journalist of sorts, and it just feels good. Plus I've gotten a look at the life of those that have music as a main priority in their being; I have gotten a look at real-life examples of the lifestyle I have always striven to live myself. And I also have the feeling that the crossing of aforementioned bridge also has the potential to bring me closer to that kind of existence, making the whole thing even more exciting and enthralling for me.

And that's actually about it. This post turned out to start as depressive, then a sudden cut followed by positivity. And I have to apologize for the inelegance of said switch in topic, but I could not for the life of me figure out how to go on after the first couple of paragraphs, so I decided to be honest about that, cut the golden thread and start anew on something taken directly out of my personal life. Anyway. I do hope that this was enjoyable to you nevertheless, and I am almost on deadline by the way. Well, nothing further need be said, except that I'll leave you, as always, with some good music:

RacknRuin - Dazed & Confused (SKisM's Baroque Out Remix)
-> This melody is so fucking awesome, I can't even begin to describe it, and combined with the heavy fucking drop and the quite well done rap, plus the female vocals, all infused into two and a half minute of awesomeness... Grand track, great artists, amazing music; those were the good days for UKF Dubstep, and Dubstep generally, so... Enjoy!

The Agitator - Say No (Cutline Remix)
-> Asides from having awesome political, anti-oppression lyrics, this song further is fucking amazing musically, with an unexpectedly executed but nevertheless gargantuan drop and an overall nice melodic make-up that reminds me of the earlier Dubstep realeases, so... Enjoy!

Kendrick Lamar feat. Mc Eiht - m.A.A.d City
-> After having put it off for an eternity because I don't believe in the newest rap releases, I finally got around to listening to Kendrick Lamar's "Good Kid, m.A.A.d City" and I can't say that I regret doing so. This guy's actually bringing Compton back on the map, and doing so quite awesomely. Plus he's featuring Mc Eiht who's pretty well-known from his work with "Compton's Most Wanted" back in the NWA-days, which is pretty huge. And Kendrick is not one of your "hoes, money, weed" kind of guys, he actually has substance in his lyrics, so... Enjoy!

Method Man & Redman - Y.O.U 
-> "That's my story, and I'm sticking to it" - Red&Meth together are just funny as hell and awesomely talented MCs, I have always loved all of their work, be it solo or together, and well this song is no exception. The only problem with this is that VEVO needed to censor it of course, but well, now you know which song I mean and can procure an uncensored version somewhere else, so... Enjoy!

Curse feat. Gentleman - Widerstand 
-> Gentleman are a German reggae group that you might have heard of seeing as they're somewhat internationally acclaimed, and Curse is one of the best German lyricists, with deep texts and awesome messages, the one in this song being love, harmony, and standing up to a corrupt and depraved system. All in all this is a great and really chill song, so... Enjoy!

Warren Zevon - The Hula Hula Boys 
-> Guess how I got the idea to feature this song? Exactly! "The curse of Lono", a great book written by my favorite author, Hunter S. Thompson. He mentioned it in there, and I've just had to Google it, and I was not disappointed. Cool song with a funny story in it, and well "I didn't come to Maui to be treated like a jerk", so... Enjoy!

So, this is it for now. And I know I'm somewhat past my deadline once again, which this time was not because I didn't get time to write, but rather because I took an eternity to choose the songs I would feature. I don't know why it took me as much time as it did, but I am definitely pleased with the outcome and I hope you are as well, I've got a pretty awesome selection above I think. And well, this post was somewhat weirder than my previous ones, but "when the going gets weird, the weird turn pro" (HST), so I am confident that this entry is worth of being on here. I hope you feel the same and that I did not bore you to death. And if I did, please be so kind as to make your demise noticeable so that you don't stink up your apartment building; rotten corpses smell really intensely bad. 


Peace!

SoundCloud Widget

As you probably haven't noticed, I added a widget displaying my latest songs posted on SoundCloud at the bottom of the page, which is more of a playful add-on to the blog rather than a serious try to promote myself.
I love all the widgets and gadgets that Blogger offers, so please let me know if it's getting too cluttered because I will not stop until I am stopped, and have terrible judgement :P

The songs on said widget are quite old anyway, even the most recent ones are almost a year old already, so do not take what you hear there as a representation of my entire musical skills and know-how, because that would be a misrepresentation of me as an artist.
Furthermore, it is German rap, and I am definitely not going to post any translations anywhere, so if you don't speak any German but still want to understand my lyrics you are unfortunately out of luck or need to find someone to translate it for you.

To be quite honest with you, I may even remove the widget again in the next couple of days for no particular reason, but if some of you actually think it serves a purpose and should be there, please let me know so that I definitely won't erase it. Then again I might leave it there even without having received any feedback. I simply don't know yet, but I'll keep you up to date on this.

So, here are the "obligatory" songs:

Modestep feat. Popeska - Another Day (xKore Remix)
-> Very well known song and remix, but seeing as it was running on repeat while I wrote this entry so I figured I'd use it, plus it's a really great remix, nice, hard-hitting bass, I like it!

Gotye feat. Kimbra - Somebody that I used to know (Bombs Away Remix)
-> An equally, or even more, popular song and its respective remix, but this is just such a great remix of this song that I had to post it at some point, and I think everyone can relate to its topic to some extent, which is also nice... All in all, great remix!!

Snoop Doggy Dogg - Who am I? (What's my name?)
-> This song is such a classic, has been around for quite some time now, and is still more than enjoyable! Snoop Dogg is one of the best MC's out there, hands down people, you know it to be true. Anyway, great song!!

Billy Talent - Fallen Leaves
-> Well, this is not my genre at all actually, and the kind of fans I believe Billy Talent to have are in all likelihood not my crowd either, but I have to say, they do have a couple of great songs that I regularly listen to!

This concludes this short notification, hope you enjoy today's selection of songs and have fun with the new widget!

Peace!

Well...

...today was a lazy-ass day for me. I woke up around 12:00, but stayed in bed until around 17:00, with the only exception being one small sport and a couple of bathroom breaks, otherwise full-on chilling on my couch with no interruptions :D

And I had so much planned for today; I was going to work on some things for university, maybe clean the apartment and go out to buy groceries, but, alas, I was couch-locked by tiredness and hits from the bong and therefore could not get myself to do a damn thing.

As much as I really want to complain about it though, I do not have any reason to do so, seeing as I love being lazy, I just love it. For me personally, the perfect day is a day like today. No movement, no stress, no nuisance, just a couch, a PC, a TV and high-speed internet access. Life is sweet! 

The only problem the keeps recurring is that damned socially-indoctrinated feeling of guilt when doing so, it's like we were conditioned not to be lazy, and, when we are, our subconscious is fighting it out of the internal reflex that brands being lazy as a bad thing, when it really is not altogether. 

Of course, laziness can cost you a lot of opportunities, but it also opens a variety of different paths to the same basic results, because most lazy people want to get there, but want to do so with as little effort as possible, and therefore usually manage to find some sort of shortcut through, or way around, obstacles on the way there. 

At least that is what I like to believe. 

On the other hand, my theory has been proven right a lot of times throughout my life so far, but then again, the opposite was proved almost as often, so I guess, being lazy in moderation is the right way to go, because, as always, it's the dose that makes the poison.

Well, not as always per se, but as in most of the cases where the saying could be applicable. 

Speaking of laziness, I was once actually too lazy, among other states of mind, to move a mouse that was a mere 5 centimeters away from my hand in order to put on a new episode of a sitcom a friend and I were watching, so we literally watched the same episode over and over again until his laptop mercifully ran out of power and finally allowed me to sleep. That's how far laziness can go under the right circumstances. 

That was a fun weekend anyway, we camped somewhere next to a road in some woods in China and got really really fucked up, it was quite awesome, I like to think back to that.

So, after having told this random story, I believe we have arrived to a point in this post where my continued 'talking' would just make things less and less interesting for you, so here are, as usually, the links to some great songs:

Eminem - Superman

-> Very well-known song, extremely popular artist, but Eminem is a fucking legend, so a few of his songs will pop up here from time to time, and this one is really great and funnily made!

Eminem feat. 50 Cent - The Re-Up

-> Well, Eminem was already playing so I stumbled upon this gem once again, haven't heard this song in eternity, imho one of the best songs of the entire album

Blue Foundation - Eyes On Fire (Zeds Dead Remix)

-> Don't know how I ended up here, but this song is also very great, very chill beginning, then an awesome drop; so an all in all nice track, definitely worth listening to entirely! 

Keizer - Keizer, Koning, Admiraal

-> Here is some Dutch rap that I really enjoy, the dude looks chill, I like his flow and the whole song is just a great piece of music!

Hollywood Undead - Undead

-> I have no clue at all whether you guys like this kind of music at all, it's somewhat of Nu-Metal/Crossover, essentially "metal" guitar playing with rapping and some sort of singing/screaming/growling incorporated into the hook, which I used to hate like three or four years ago, but nowadays I can actually enjoy it, tell me how you like it 

Snoop Lion - Lighter's Up! (feat. Mavado & Popcaan)

-> Well, lots of people have mixed feelings towards the whole "Snoop Lion" thing, but I personally think it's great that Snoop has found another purpose in life and now preaches peace and reggae, I mean, why not, it's good for him, and we get to enjoy Snoop singing Reggae songs

So, this concludes today's entry, I know it wasn't overly long or filled with tons of relevant content, but I do hope that it was still enjoyable!

Peace!

God damn it...

...it's 04:30 AM and I am wide awake, and did not even take anything, nor go out tonight. I mean seriously, what the fuck is this? I've been trying to sleep since around one o'clock, but seems like I'm pulling an all-nighter. Great. Just what I needed after a long and sleep-deprived week. Another night of restlessness.

But who am I to complain? I've got shelter. I've got food. I've got some of that good-good. I've got a TV and I have got a working internet access (obviously...), so I should be all set for the remaining few hours of actual night. 

And I can already hear your internal screams: "But, man, why don't you just smoke yourself to sleep if you've got some of that good-good lying around?!?", but, seriously guys, don't you think that I have already thought of and tried that? Of course I did. But it was obviously, for reasons I can not possibly fathom, unsuccessful thus far, meaning that I'll try again after posting this, I have to be able to sleep somehow at some point :D

So yeah, actually I just wanted to... well, basically just do anything right now, seeing as lying in bed does not seem to lead to sleepiness tonight, so I'm thinking that maybe if I just tire out my eyes and fingers I'll be able to fall asleep. But that seems somewhat unlikely at this point, so I'll just bore the crap out of you guys for the heck of it. 

Well, here's some things to do on the internet while you're at it:

http://www.youtube.com/channel/UCSDxHir7pmMTmJ_-tlK7NHA

-> This is the BRealTV Channel on Youtube, and he has some funny and interesting videos on there, so, yeah, check that out if you care for B-Real and his music

http://www.youtube.com/channel/UCn8zNIfYAQNdrFRrr8oibKw

-> This here is the "VICE" Youtubechannel, and I've got to say, although I am not at all involved in the alternative scene they mostly cater to, they have got some very interesting documentaries and interviews on there, that are definitely awesome to kill time and worth checking out

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RNq64eKwkIY GREEN

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5Dky6N9tFnw GOLD

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Y9YqC22ZSh0 RED

-> These are the three different kinds of 'The ULTIMATE Ganja Mix' on Youtube, which are really awesome to listen to even when not high, and have some great songs in them that a lot of people will not know, which is pretty cool seeing as most listeners will discover a couple of new songs, or even bands, through these mixes. Big shout out toSupaDupaFli79 for uploading (and creating? I really do not know, so please tell me if you do) these great compilations of great music for all of us to enjoy!

So, I have hereby essentially completed my second blog entry, and I've got to say, I'm starting to actually enjoy just writing down my thoughts, or rather my random patterns of these, in an online environment where everyone can read it, which is probably related to the basic human need of recognition, but pretty sweet nevertheless :D 

Well, I hope this did not completely bore anybody out of their minds, and if it did, I apologize.... NOT!

(no seriously if this bores you, you have probably chosen the wrong blog to read...)

Anyway, thanks for reading!

Peace!

P.S.: If I do not get any sleep before 10 AM I'm making another post about sleep deprivation....