The holidays

have brought with them a weird tingling feel inside of me - I am annoyed. By all those things summer actually: Sun, happiness, love, and all similarly mind-numbing happy-makers that us humans seem to so desperately depend on.
Yes, I am once again in my favorite state of being: alone, pissed off, and eager to vent in writing. So this will be a treat for you cynically-depressed maniacs out there. I cannot for the life of me figure out where this mood comes from though. I mean, I have been alone again for a while now; I haven't had any problems with other people, and am generally not feeling bad per se. So why is this annoyed anger amassing amongst my neuronal axons? I don't know to be honest. I simply don't. All I know is that I sifted through tons of trash and spam mail this morning and came across an old e-mail by my bitch of an ex-girlfriend from a few years ago. And well, this got me curious enough to see if she had still blocked me on Facebook, and well, she has. Which I find funny actually, seeing as she was the one who tore my heart to pieces back then, but somehow felt that I was the one that needing blocking out. 

Anyway. I am not here to rant about some lower life-form crawling around somewhere in the more disgusting parts of Germany. No, I am today going to address the grand topic of why summery weather is annoying as fuck. Don't get me wrong though, I like having it warm and lying down in the sun near a lake with a beer,  but still, the summer always brings along your typical, ever-grinning idiots that cannot seem to find a thing wrong with this fucked up world of ours. At least not when "the sun is shining, man". Fuckers all. It's a trend that has and probably always will be prevalent in some people, and it's always worst during summer. I have had it with those kind of humans always seeing the best in any situation, worsening my usual annoyance with their overly enthusiastic attitude about anything. I mean, I sound like a grumpy asshole right now, but in reality I just want to chill. It's not like I'm running around with a sour face all day and poisoning everyones' good mood. I just cannot stand the fact that people seem to think that things are always that much better in the summer. And I cannot stand the relentless and redundant notion of constantly perpetuating a status of this jolly but ultimately annoying overdrive-happiness that some people exude as soon as the temperatures outside start to rise even the slightest bit. It's just downright stupid if you ask me. I mean of course it's deeply rooted in our evolutionary make-up, seeing as sun means warmth and life, and stands for fertility and prosperity, so it is understandable that sunlight speaks to our primal instincts and therefore compels us to feel more enthusiastic and "alive". But still, aren't we at the top of the food chain because we managed not to succumb to these primitive urges but rather developed a consciousness and a rational mind to think abstractly about situations before entering a thoughtless frenzy of emotion-based dumbness? It seems to me that the same way rose-tainted glasses manage to alter my perception of things when socially intertwined in what is commonly referred to as a "relationship", sunny weather alters the perception of aforementioned people. I mean I can relate to being completely tangled in an emotional net of instinct-driven decisions, but at some point a stop needs to be put to the madness that is emotional thinking and logic needs to return as the prevalent influence on decisions. Without logic, we'd return to a state of dumb beasts, purely living for survival and reproduction. And if we get back to that point we might as well go back to living in the woods and sustaining ourselves by hunting. So please people, keep your emotions aside next time you decide to be happy and think about actual reasons to be besides it being warm outside, which for me simply does not count.

But well. Most people, as do I, do base a lot of everyday decisions on instinct and intuition. And that is not wrong. Per se. It is normal that we don't analyze every step we take, otherwise humanity would still be stuck in the dark ages simply due to the fact that development would have taken forever. But the problem I addressed above refers much more to those decisions and/or feelings that should be analyzed properly before being taken or felt, seeing as their impact is large enough to justify a slow but well thought through decision.

Okay, I am going to be honest with you guys: I have no idea where I'm going with this, and no clue how to go on. So I am not going to go on, and instead switch my focus to a different topic altogether: a lifestyle I have encountered during a sort of job interview I've had recently. I was meeting the guy I am now going to write articles for in a larger city close to the little town I live in, and he decided to take me with him to meet a few producers and artists he works with in order to write a trial article which would be the base for his appraisal of my writing and therefore also for his decision whether to hire me or not. And well, we ended up in an alternative kind of living community, where artists work, live, drink and smoke together. An enthralling experience to say the least. These people represent for me the kind of life I have always been keen on: the life of a drifter, only marginal responsibilities but full dedication to their art and their peers, a harmonious togetherness outside of mainstream society but not entirely cut-off either. They're doing what I've always been preaching: "living without, but working within". All of them have small jobs to pay the bills and make ends meet, but ultimately their life revolves around their passion that is music. I want that. Exactly that. Which is why I am so glad I got the job as a columnist for the guy, seeing as I have now direct access to these people and can get my foot in the door of journalism, meaning that I am one step closer to being able to lead a similar life: focusing on writing and maybe even making music whilst not being held down in the grudges and dogmas of regular society. The feeling elicited by this vibrant community of like-minded people was as gargantuan in deepness as it was in exhilaration. I finally got to see the kind of life and dedication to a passion I had thought lost in this day and age. I cannot stress how fucking authentic these guys were, how damn cool and relaxed their view of the world was, and how they had very similar views on issues I find important. I mean, this is exactly what I have been striving for, it's quite liberating to know that the possibility of leading such a life is very real and not that far out of reach for me anymore. Plus I now have the opportunity to prove myself in the journalistic field to some extent, which makes me really anxious to finally get to writing the next article. These articles I am writing are by the way almost exclusively going to be coverages of parties this guys' organization throws, and all my expenses will be covered, which is nice. But I am actually just happy to get my name out there. That can of course, as most things in life be traced back to the most basic of human needs asides from shelter and food: the need for recognition. I know that, you know that, everyone does. Understandable enough though, isn't it? As I had already ascertained in an earlier post, we all strive for immortality of sorts. And getting a step closer to being able to work as a journalist/columnist, and thereby having hundreds, if not thousands of people read my words, however mundane and formal they may be in the case of my new job (I was told to keep things formal and clean, at least in the articles that is), and that alone already brings me a bit closer to being unforgettable and rooted in peoples' minds for eternity. I like to think that at least my writing will be able to live on when my body slowly crumbles under the sum of accidents and intoxicants that should long ago have killed me; and if that is actually the case at any point in my life, I will gladly embrace death with a laughter that will echo in history. But enough of that. If I talk about this fascinating idea too much it'll become mundane and I risk sounding self-absorbed, which is something I am not and therefore want to avoid coming across as. 
The point I want to make in all this is actually just that I feel like I've finally crossed the first of probably many bridges on my way to establishing myself as an actual wordsmith and journalist of sorts, and it just feels good. Plus I've gotten a look at the life of those that have music as a main priority in their being; I have gotten a look at real-life examples of the lifestyle I have always striven to live myself. And I also have the feeling that the crossing of aforementioned bridge also has the potential to bring me closer to that kind of existence, making the whole thing even more exciting and enthralling for me.

And that's actually about it. This post turned out to start as depressive, then a sudden cut followed by positivity. And I have to apologize for the inelegance of said switch in topic, but I could not for the life of me figure out how to go on after the first couple of paragraphs, so I decided to be honest about that, cut the golden thread and start anew on something taken directly out of my personal life. Anyway. I do hope that this was enjoyable to you nevertheless, and I am almost on deadline by the way. Well, nothing further need be said, except that I'll leave you, as always, with some good music:

RacknRuin - Dazed & Confused (SKisM's Baroque Out Remix)
-> This melody is so fucking awesome, I can't even begin to describe it, and combined with the heavy fucking drop and the quite well done rap, plus the female vocals, all infused into two and a half minute of awesomeness... Grand track, great artists, amazing music; those were the good days for UKF Dubstep, and Dubstep generally, so... Enjoy!

The Agitator - Say No (Cutline Remix)
-> Asides from having awesome political, anti-oppression lyrics, this song further is fucking amazing musically, with an unexpectedly executed but nevertheless gargantuan drop and an overall nice melodic make-up that reminds me of the earlier Dubstep realeases, so... Enjoy!

Kendrick Lamar feat. Mc Eiht - m.A.A.d City
-> After having put it off for an eternity because I don't believe in the newest rap releases, I finally got around to listening to Kendrick Lamar's "Good Kid, m.A.A.d City" and I can't say that I regret doing so. This guy's actually bringing Compton back on the map, and doing so quite awesomely. Plus he's featuring Mc Eiht who's pretty well-known from his work with "Compton's Most Wanted" back in the NWA-days, which is pretty huge. And Kendrick is not one of your "hoes, money, weed" kind of guys, he actually has substance in his lyrics, so... Enjoy!

Method Man & Redman - Y.O.U 
-> "That's my story, and I'm sticking to it" - Red&Meth together are just funny as hell and awesomely talented MCs, I have always loved all of their work, be it solo or together, and well this song is no exception. The only problem with this is that VEVO needed to censor it of course, but well, now you know which song I mean and can procure an uncensored version somewhere else, so... Enjoy!

Curse feat. Gentleman - Widerstand 
-> Gentleman are a German reggae group that you might have heard of seeing as they're somewhat internationally acclaimed, and Curse is one of the best German lyricists, with deep texts and awesome messages, the one in this song being love, harmony, and standing up to a corrupt and depraved system. All in all this is a great and really chill song, so... Enjoy!

Warren Zevon - The Hula Hula Boys 
-> Guess how I got the idea to feature this song? Exactly! "The curse of Lono", a great book written by my favorite author, Hunter S. Thompson. He mentioned it in there, and I've just had to Google it, and I was not disappointed. Cool song with a funny story in it, and well "I didn't come to Maui to be treated like a jerk", so... Enjoy!

So, this is it for now. And I know I'm somewhat past my deadline once again, which this time was not because I didn't get time to write, but rather because I took an eternity to choose the songs I would feature. I don't know why it took me as much time as it did, but I am definitely pleased with the outcome and I hope you are as well, I've got a pretty awesome selection above I think. And well, this post was somewhat weirder than my previous ones, but "when the going gets weird, the weird turn pro" (HST), so I am confident that this entry is worth of being on here. I hope you feel the same and that I did not bore you to death. And if I did, please be so kind as to make your demise noticeable so that you don't stink up your apartment building; rotten corpses smell really intensely bad. 


Peace!

I can't dance

or sing for that matter. That is what I just realized whilst sitting here in Statistics class and internally whistling the Scissor Sisters song. It's not something that bothers me or anything, I have always had a strong stance against the social convention of dressing up prettily and moving to the tact of classical music with a partner. Which is something that people do not seem to understand, but I personally have always seen dancing as an act of ultimate conformity to an ancient, obsolete system and equally dated values. And fuck me if I am going to do that, I have not ever been convinced by anyone to do so, and whilst some may see it differently, I treat that as an accomplishment. A pretty huge one actually, given the pressure multiple parties put me under when graduation day approached. But like a rock in the surge I remained resilient against any and all tries to get me to "finally" learn how to dance. Fucking hell, those people were annoying. Like my memory of that day would have been enhanced by the knowledge that I moved around to stupid-ass music like a fucking clone. It would actually have been worsened by it, which is why I stayed strong, and, in spite of all pleas and offers, did not join in when "all the graduates" were asked to "come down to the floor", but rather stayed in the back with a good friend of mine enjoying my beer, my decision, and my life in general. It was a good night. And the faces of pure confusion and anger on my classmates' faces when they realized that I was actually being serious was fucking priceless to say the least. Just remembering that evening actually causes a big grin to appear on my face, and isn't that what really counts? That I can personally look back at my graduation party and know that I enjoyed myself there. Even if doing so meant that I had to piss off quite a lot of people. 

But well, it's not like I have ever cared about them or their opinions. And that's not only referring to my former classmates, some of which were actually alright, but rather to mankind altogether. "I just don't give a fuck.", as Eminem so fittingly put it. Which applies to me in a lot of ways. I simply do not care about so many things. That is a kind of behavior that has been prevalent throughout my existence, but always in different forms. I have not given a fuck all throughout high school, which back then showed itself in me skipping classes and living as unhealthily as possible. But those were mainly my hormones acting up I guess. Nowadays I have just stopped giving a fuck about society and my place within it. And I have stopped caring so much that I am the most tolerant person you'll ever meet, because I simply have no interest in your color of skin, sexual preferences, and way of dressing or acting. At all. "Live and let live" are real words to live by here. As long as you don't annoy me, I won't annoy you. And if you try to annoy me I will just leave. It's as simple as that, and if more people thought that way, the world would be a much better place. But I have touched on this issue before. Notwithstanding I am feeling a sudden urge to write about it again, but am rather doubtful that I will come to any fresh conclusions or revelations in the course of doing so. Is it really that hard to find new topics though? I mean not only here, but more like generally. My entire way of being and thinking seems to revolve around a few central themes and issues that change in manifestation but never in essence. It all boils down to the same exact stew. And whilst that may seem like something one would easily get sick and tired of, I don't actually mind. For reasons outlined above mainly. Even if my life were the monotonous dulling glob that I fear it is sometimes, why should I care? I am quite happy with the way things are going lately, and have always had a certain sense of contentedness in my life. In some periods that was essentially gone, but it always remained lingering in the background of my psyche. Which can once again be related to the fact that not giving a fuck makes you de facto happy, seeing as when you just don't care about things they quickly stop bothering you. So, am I perpetuating the "yolo" lifestyle that has apparently become dominant in my generation by saying that not giving a fuck is the way to go? I like to think that I'm not. It is so fucking pathetic to use that slogan as an excuse for incredibly stupid and at times dangerous behavior. I mean you know my feelings towards drug-use and similar things, but there is such a thing as doing it smartly, and in moderation. And the people that actually use such slogans as a way to define their "unique" lifestyle are just fucking idiots. Such. Fucking. Idiots. Which is why I draw a very clear line between these fuckers and myself. My definition of not giving a fuck and living life for the day differs largely from what these... creatures believe to be the "right way to go, man". I mean there is an obvious difference between healthy non-caring and deliberately getting into dangerous situations. Even if it may seem similar, and even though the reasons might be akin to each other, the resulting personalities are extremely different. So fucking different that I feel the need to make sure I am not ever thrown into a pot with these fucking parasites. Behaving like a jackass does not make you "cool" or give you "swag". And I should kill myself for even using a word like the latter. But I am in need of making a point, so it's somewhat appropriate. Anyway, it seems that nowadays the common denominator among these people is that stupidity and recklessness pay off, or make you cool. I mean what the hell? That is just too idiotic to be put into words. Actually it's sad. How youth culture has deteriorated since "the good old days" that I myself unfortunately never experienced is fucking depressing to say the least. Damn, I sound like an old hippie reminiscing the sixties: "Back in the Woodstock days our movement meant something man, we were changing the world one trip at a time". Ha. Albeit being too cliche for words, this sentence holds a truth. Not caring about the obsolete societal system in place used to be expressed in political songs and demonstrations combined with heavy use of psychoactive substances. But nowadays it's simply not about the real anymore. Nowadays that carelessness is expressed in idiocy, which is of course exactly the way the system in place and those guarding it want it to be: "Let the idiots live their pathetic fantasies while we're making cash and brainwashing future generations with our poisoned, foul, and rotten ideologies". And without noticing it, a lot of people are simply playing into that, doing what they're supposed to, functioning without thinking, not smoking but drinking, and slowly turning into lifeless shells that have more resemblance to decaying cadavers than to human beings. This can essentially be related back to a few of my anti-society posts, but I think I've never touched on this particular aspect before.

Actually, let's look at it from another perspective. Think about a nightclub, or a rave. What does it look like these days? There's sluts in skirts barely covering any flesh weirdly shaking their behinds to bad electronic music with even worse vocals, there's the guys that only come out of the gym for the party and look like a drunk Schwarzenegger copy (which is not a fucking compliment by the way), and there's your typical aggressive asshole only looking for a fight. And what happens there? Well, the sluts usually get fucked by the Schwarzeneggers at some point, the assholes get into fights with each other, and "normal" club-goers like me have long left because the scene was too obscene and depraved to bear. Now think about the same place or event, but 30 to 50 years ago. There were close to no fights. There were no totally-ripped, abercrombie&fitch wearing douches. There were sluts, but they weren't instantly recognizable as such, and there was at least a little work involved to get into their pants. The people were not there because they wanted to make sure that everyone sees how fucking cool they feel they are, no, the people were there to drop some acid, pop a couple of pills, and be unified in happiness and dance. They felt a sense of togetherness within the music; they felt as part of a movement that tuned in and dropped out just for the heck of it, but also as a statement to authority, society, and the conservative system. These day-dreaming hippies had more political ambition in their little finger than today's club-goers will ever have in their entire being. And that is just fucking sad. I mean of course, going out shouldn't have to be a sign of protest every time, and it should of course be about having fun, but that's not even the way it is nowadays. No, these days going out feels like going to a beauty-contest of sorts; everybody is trying to look better than the next person, everyone is trying to show that they can do the most drugs ('combat-drinking' as it is called in Germany, and yes alcohol is a drug, actually one of the worst ones there are), and no-one is showing that they're just fucking stoked to be there with all the similar-minded people. Simply because people are not even close to being similar to each other anymore, and everyone is going to these clubs for a plethora of different reasons, meaning that the unison that was felt "back in the days" is completely out of the picture. And that is what is most sad - people are competing instead of co-operating, hating instead of loving, and destroying instead of creating. We need to go back to what the students in '69 were trying to convey to us: Peace, Love, and Harmony. As much as these words sound like cliches of a stoned acid-freak, it would make the world a much better place if everyone just tried to apply the underlying concept to their own lives. So much better. But well, that's not the way a "normal" human being is supposed to be apparently, no, we're geared for competition in all aspects of our existence, we're taught to always outsmart and outdo others in order to succeed. We need to fucking change our way of thinking. Or we'll just use our nukes at some point and wipe ourselves out completely. Which would probably be best anyway.

Well, all that is essentially left to say is that I really hope that at least some of you will try and incorporate the thoughts expressed above into your lives, if just a couple people would behave differently and try to achieve harmony with their surroundings, I would be extremely happy. But anyway, I hope I have at least given you something to think about, or reminded you of values long forgotten. And well, at this point I will as always leave you with some good music:

Showtek - Fuck The System 
-> Oh my god. How much better of a song could I have picked? He essentially reiterates the thoughts expressed above, and well although hardstyle is not my all-time favorite kind of music, this song gets really well after the somewhat boring intro. And well, for all of you impatient people that want to know what the fuck I was talking about when I said he essentially says the same as me, fast forward to 0:59. But anyway, this song holds so much truth, and really expresses words to live by more or less if you ask me, so... Enjoy!

Torqux - No Way Back 
-> Look, I've spent some time on the UKF Dubstep channel once again, and stumbled upon this dark beauty here. Amazing intro that sound somewhat familiar (if anyone knows where I could know it from please let me know!), slowly building up to insane drops and an overall musical awesomeness with an extremely heavy, somber feel to it. Well, an all in all amazing tune, so... Enjoy!

D12 - Purple Pills 
-> "Cool, calm, just like my mom, with a couple of Valium inside her palm" Eminem was so much better on drugs. Like most artists actually, as soon as they're clean they stop making this creatively fucked up and awesomely funny music. But well, this song is just so fucking great, I can't even put into words how much I enjoy listening to it over and over and over again, it's just such a drug-enthusiastic track couple with D12's unique humor. This tune is so great you have no choice but to... Enjoy! (it)

Eminem - The Kids 
-> "Drugs are bad, m'kay?" Haha. Well, I have to say that I usually don't feature an artist twice in one post, but well, this song just needed to be here because it is as awesome as the one above, and just sarcastically shows the extreme examples that are always made up in the media when it comes to the topic of drugs, making this song even more awesome, and well Eminem's humor is just so great. And yeah, I have noticed that the lyrics' timing is way off, but I couldn't find another video right now, so you'll just have to live with that. Anyway, this song is fucking awesome, so... Enjoy!

The Beatles - Lucy In The Sky With Diamonds 
-> Some say this song was based on a picture John Lennon's son, but I believe it is about LSD (as do many others). It just describes this incredibly individual and spiritual drug so perfectly, it shows how abstract it is and how little one can actually say about it. And well "Lucy in the Sky with Diamonds". And the trippy-ass video that looks like it was thought up whilst on acid anyway. Regardless of the songs content though, it is musically awesome and The Beatles were just a great band, so...Enjoy!

Deep Purple - Child In Time
-> Here is another psychedelic classic, this time by Deep Purple, and well... music like this just isn't made anymore. The incredible vocals, the drums, the guitar, just everything, it's like a perfect orgasm slowly rising and coming to an amazingly beautiful finale. This is one of the songs that remind of why I enjoy music so much, it reminds me that I was born way too late, and shows how fucking talented musicians used to be. All in all, it's just an amazing tune that everyone should know, and if you don't you're in for a treat, so... Enjoy!

Well, I once again fucked up the deadline, didn't I? But not as badly as last time, this post took only 10 days instead of eleven to be completed. Which is still three days too much, but I'm slowly getting there. Anyway, this entry is mostly concerning itself with society, not giving a fuck, and drugs, which are very dominant themes in this blog, but well, these are also the things I spent most of my time thinking about, so I put these thoughts down here. Plus I am really trying to slowly work through all aspects of these topics. Which is impossible to do in a single post, so I am always rehashing these subjects in a different light, which is hopefully enjoyable to you.


Peace!

So, here we are

at the very top of western civilization. And is there anything to take away from this maddening scheme that is our time? I am not so sure that there actually is.
I mean we have all these amazing achievements, mankind has come such a long way since the first ape decided to walk on two legs, but still I am ambivalent when it comes to defining what worth there actually is in our existence. And I am not even going to touch the whole big question thing here. I am simply trying to wrap my mind around the ego that us humans have developed in the course of evolution. All we're doing is fucking, drinking, and slowly killing each other, we're essentially playing GTA with the world. And I'm not even sure of that.

What I am sure of though is that I am sitting on my couch right now, showcasing my inner makings to an anonymous public with my roommate snoring on an air-mattress next to me, slowly drifting through various stratospheres whilst watching Californication and smoking. My eyes are somewhat focused on the screen of my laptop and on the TV at the same time, and I can't help but feel a certain resemblance between myself and Hank Moody. I know it's fucking cliche, and I also know that everybody likes to think that they can identify with their favorite fictional character, but goddamn, I have been where this guy is portrayed as being in my own way, so I feel somewhat of a strange relation between myself and the idea of "Hank Moody". Not the person per se obviously, seeing as we're talking about a fictional character, but much more the idea of the guy. The free-lancing writer, the crazed, erratic, gonzo-influenced author, the anti-hero essentially. The other extreme so to say. The anti-gravitational pole, the scapegoat, the punching bag.

I think that we all create our lives in a way so that we are the protagonist of our own little tale, we all want to be the martyr, the chosen one, we all want recognition in some way or another.  What we're all essentially striving for is immortality of sorts, be it by monetary success, literary excellence, musical masterpieces, or anything else that can enable us to buy a place in the expensive neighborhood called 'history' forever. By expensive I do not mean any actual value, but rather the effort and sacrifice that is necessary to achieve such a place, the relentless pursuit of having one's name remembered by the world that costs its high price in its own way, simply because remembrance is almost exclusively created in destruction and despair. In order to be known you need to have suffered, seems to be the most common denominator found among ïtoday's audiences, which is pretty rough on those creating entertainment because albeit leading to works of staggering genius, these rough patches that are the root of excellence do fuck you up quite intensely over time, and results are usually just a coincidental side-effect of these lows, which in themselves are not defined by a feeling of contributing to the literary pedigree by using the blues to create an epitaph to these periods of sadness, but rather just by wallowing in narcissistic despair and self-loathing until the brink of collapse, at which point words are the only thing keeping one from entering an eternal drug and drinking binge. Still, these fruits grown from sad soil using depressed fertilizers are usually the rarest literary gems that authors have to offer, making the fear and loathing leading up to their creation a necessity for actual greatness, which is a pretty hard blow on the writing and entertainment community seeing as no-one really wants to suffer for an essentially unknown audience, but everybody has to in order to achieve true greatness, at least that's what it seems like.

But this tangent about immortality through depressive genius just coincidentally appeared above to be honest. I am still unsure, once again, about the actual points I was thinking of making when I started to write this about two days ago in a hazed frenzy in the middle of the night, completely strung out and manically trying to recognize the letters I was typing, which I did up to a point of complete desperation, then I stopped continuing working until now. But even in retrospect I am quite contend with what I wrote, I believe I touched on some interesting issues in there, but this is not the time for self-flattery. No, I think I will now address a different topic altogether, namely that of communication.

Sounds boring enough when put like that, but I can assure you that it's not. Think about it, in all of its aspects. We communicate to express things in a way that other individuals can understand and respond to, that much is obvious. But why is it so hard still, after a few million years of practice, to actually say what we want to say in a way that people understand? I mean, the biggest problems usually arise from miscommunication, and its the simplest things, the smallest of words, the slightest of mistakes that can set into motion a chain-reaction of unforeseeable events leading up to huge altercations or similar nuisances. And why? Most words aren't even that ambiguous in themselves, but it's the context in which they are used combined with the humans natural need to over-analyze and interpret utterances by others that renders them indecipherable to some, making these individuals prone to misunderstandings, which is not their fault per se, but they are rather, in most cases that is, to be seen as mere victims of circumstance. But unfortunately, there is an equal amount of people either too stupid to understand the actual essence of what they are being told, or too biased by their own preconceived notions to even try to understand anything but what they want to understand, making fruitful communication damn near impossible. We have now essentially made out that there are people that are enticed by circumstance to misunderstand, that there are people too stupid to understand, and that there are people who don't want to understand what is being said because of their own prejudice. So, why do we even bother communicating anymore? 

The answer to that is, as many things are, based on the basic human need for social recognition by others, we are social animals after all, driven by the instinct to express and impress ourselves and others, meaning that even though most people we will encounter will not understand, not properly at least, what we're trying to tell them we will still keep on uttering sentences and opinions in their proximity because of the slight chance that at least one of them will be able to grasp the intended meaning. Because we need our personal meaning to be conveyed to other people, we want others to understand the essence behind the sentences, but unfortunately the understanding usually does not match the intentions, which is just sad because messages and opinions are easily deluded simply by misinterpretation, by ambiguity. 

Even these words right here will not sound to you the way they sound to me, will not convey to you what they convey to me, and will not reach you the way I mean them to, and I am very aware of that. But I know what I want to say, and I know that the people who feel as I feel can usually understand underlying themes and subtle references in these texts, and those who do not feel that way are not meant to understand anyway and will therefore read and understand whatever fits best into their narrow perception, and not what I actually want to say, which is fine, because it separates the wheat from the chaff, separates those that see actual value in what I write from those just along for the ride.

"The ride". The inexplicable yet omnipresent journey, the basic drive forward that compels us all to move towards an unidentified goal. This crazy roller-coaster of life that jolts us up and down in completely randomized and erratic patterns with seemingly no logical adjacency. We all know it to be true, life is composed of its highs and lows that in the long-run cancel each other out to create a comfortable drift in retrospect. In retrospect mind you, an up always feels like an up, and a down always feels like a down, but looking back it was all just somewhere in the middle. And isn't that exactly what we're programmed to be striving for? The passive middle, the inactive acceptance, the elemination of all the extremes, a dulling numbness of the senses? Searching for what's right or what's true is no longer perceived as necessary, no, just finding what works, however badly, has become the most prestigious achievement attainable. But unfortunately that's nicely aligning with my point about mediocrity being the end that is in itself a mean to obtain personal gratification, meaning that I am actually part of the root of this problem to some extent. But then again maintaining that level of constant mediocrity essentially boils down to being well above average in order to be able to seem mediocre enough so as to not having to do more than needed and expected at that level, which in turn means that the search for right and true has already been done personally, just not publicly. Notwithstanding it is just small percentage where this applies, most people seeming to be fine with what works and allegedly not searching for truth or rightfulness are actually like that and do not pretend to be just to have to do less. Or maybe we just don't know it yet.

But anyway. I have been drifting around between topics and ideas way too much in this post, which is why I'll put a stop to this madness now, and leave you be with some music, as always: 

Iron Maiden - No Prayer For The Dying
-> Great track from the Maiden' album of the same name, beautiful guitars and vocal, legendary band, and the rest of the album is definitely worth listening to as well if you haven't yet, so... Enjoy! 

Leonard Cohen - Hallejulah (Rufus Wrainwright Cover)
-> I first heard Cohen's original version back in the 2000 or so when my I was riding in my mum's car to somewhere, heard it again in the Watchmen movie like eight years later, and now found this awesome cover of it. And albeit not being the least bit religious I find this song to be amazingly beautiful and somewhat inspiring, so... Enjoy!

Bob Marley - Jammin' (Live Version)
-> Unfortunately I could not find the studio version of this on the mobile version of YouTube, don't know if it's there in the desktop version, but it doesn't really matter, you all know this song anyway, and it's an all-time classic that needed featuring on here, so... Enjoy!

Alborosie - Kingston Town
-> I haven't listened to this song in what feels like forever, a friend of my showed it to me in 2009 or 10 I believe, during a weekend of camping that consisted solely of getting too messed up for words, which was fun, and the song reminds me of that and is in itself really awesome, so... Enjoy! 

Keizer - Niet Haten
-> First of all, I want to emphasize that I neither condone nor endorse the whole "hashtag" craze that has taken over the internet, I am thoroughly despised by it actually. Nevertheless, Keizer is a fucking beast and one of the fastet European rappers to date, make sure to listen to the complete track, the third part is the most mind-blowing (starts at 1:50 for all you impatient people), but the whole song is pretty cool, so... Enjoy!

Ice Cube - Hello (ft. Mc Ren & Dr. Dre)
-> Did I put this on here already at some point? If I did I'm sorry, but I don't think so... Anyway, awesome classic track, first heard whilst watching the "Up In Smoke" Tour on DVD and on numerous occassions since... Enjoy! 

So, this turned out to be a somewhat disorganized post, dealing with my multiple lines of thought throughout, but I do hope it's still enjoyable, I completed it in multiple sittings and usually in an altered state of mind, so it may seem somewhat erratic at some points, but I think I managed to mostly keep it together. Anyway, I am uploading this from my mobile phone in a Coffeeshop, and seeing as I have never done that before I don't know whether there are any adverse effects on layout or links when accessing it from a PC, please let me know if that is the case!

Peace! 

Edit: it was the case, the spacings and paragraphs were off, but I took care of that now. And btw, that kind of thing is what the comment section is there for, someone could have said that it looks weird, there were at least 8 people that read it before I fixed it, and in my opinion it was clearly visible that the spacing etc. were not the way they're supposed to, but maybe that's just me...  

Food For Thought #4

Hmpf.
I could not get around to writing anything this weekend unfortunately, seeing as my rich, snobby-ass landlords forced me to renovate my fucking apartment, which is not something that I completely opposed doing seeing as renovating was kind of necessary, but in principle I disagree with being forced to do anything, especially by some shady clause in a shady-ass contract, and especially when it makes me postpone my new post until the next month, so that now there are only three posts in February. Good job, assholes.
But now my apartment is renovated and looks nice and new, which is great. Just great. Especially considering that I am moving out in two months. Awesome. I love working for other people, because I am such a fucking humanitarian. It just pisses me off that I was conned into signing something that forces me to actually renovate my flat not because I feel like it but because my landlords feel like it.

I am getting lost in raging thoughts though. I mean I am at fault too, but I really didn't have a choice either, so I guess in the end, everyone and no-one is to blame. The peaceful way of the middle, as always. But all of that is not the reason I am posting tonight, no, as the title already gave away, I have decided to actually sit down and finally write a new "Food For Thought" segment in which I will be tormenting you with my thoughts on my latest obsession, which is essentially just pissing out of my ass and venting about random things. There is only a slight problem. I am lacking a topic, like literally drawing a blank. I sat down, knowing that I wanted to write a new "Food For Thought", ready to bust out fifteen hundred words of compressed wisdom, yet here I am, getting lost in meaningless ramblings once again, unable to formulate a sentence that has more meaning to it than the sum of its words. It's crazy, I've already struggled with this in my last post, and had promised myself to start this month with something of actual value to you, my readers. So, here goes nothing.

Have you ever wondered about the problems stemming from people projecting their own inadequacies on others that are situated below themselves in whatever hierarchy they happen to be in and the harm that these people are actually causing? You probably haven't, so allow me to elaborate.
What I mean is something we have all encountered at some point in our lives, be it at school, at university, at the workplace, or anywhere with an enforced hierarchy. In these places there are always people who have managed to stay in a company or organization long enough to move up the ranks without drawing any attention to their utter lack of competence and social skills. When these people then arrive in a position that grants them a certain amount of authority they see that as the perfect opportunity to make everybody pay for their lack of skills by trying to make people feel as unfit for life as they actually are. And the worst part is that, since they are backed by authority they are actually succeeding. At least that is the feeling I am getting. The first time I even noticed the existence of this phenomena was back in elementary school.
I was in France, and had German classes, and the teacher insisted on teaching us a wrong conjugation of an irregular verb, so I told her that she was telling us complete and utter bullshit. But alas, seeing as she had the authority, my entire class was taught wrongly until I managed to get the headmaster to talk to the bitch. And even he was reluctant to do so at first, but seeing as he was a good person he listened to reason. And grammar. But let's examine what happened here. The teacher somehow managed to cover up her failure as an educator up to this point. I then stumbled upon that burden by uncovering a common mistake that could have been dismissed by her as such. But her inability to admit that error shows that she feels that her underlying insecurity and inadequacy is being exposed, making her take a defensive and aggressive stance towards my correcting her because she feels threatened in her authority and authenticity.
This behavior is not typical only to elementary school teachers, but it's prevalent everywhere in life. And in my example it was clear-cut case, which it usually isn't, making it extremely difficult to distinguish the actually well-meant influences from those that simply arose from underlying imperfections the influencing person finds in him- or herself. Let's for example take the manager whose wife is always nagging him about him being too busy with his job and not making time for his family. He knows this to be true, but does not want to face that it's his own faults that led to this being the case, meaning that he will now try to pass these inadequacies onto his subordinates by making them work longer and bashing the results of this extended work, leading to them feeling incompetent and worthless, and ultimately reducing their chances of having a successful career because their self-esteem is thereby steadily decreasing over time. These parasites that can not handle their own pathetic lives are slowly grinding down the motivation of the intelligent visionaries stuck in lower-management positions, poisoning the creativity and spirit of those hierarchically below them.
And you know what? It is our motherfucking fault. Yes, we are all once again to blame. We've let these stupid insecure assholes go through high school, college, and university without even trying to properly educate them. And by that I don't mean just factual data from books and general knowledge. I also mean that these people were never taught to be secure about their insecurities, these people have never been taught that being wrong is okay, even if you're hierarchically higher than the person who's right. And you know why they have never learned all that? Because it is not taught anywhere. Those up the chain are always right, their authority is without question, we are not taught to ask and defy anymore but rather to accept and obey, which is a practice that creates the kind of people I was talking about earlier - the kind of people that only understand the alleged superiority of those in power, do not bother questioning things, and think that they're on top of the world anyway, until the moment comes where someone in a lower rank is smarter. That's when all hell breaks loose. That's when these assholes try to suppress any criticism directed towards them, which in turn makes those criticizing insecure in their right and finally shuts them up for good until they reach an upper-management position themselves where they will, out of experience, repeat the same bullshit again and again, until every shred of initiative and intelligence has been squashed and these creatures remain in their ignorant positions of perceived power forever. Because being smart doesn't matter. Doing the right things doesn't matter. Behaving like a decent human being doesn't matter. Knowing right from wrong doesn't matter. Nothing fucking matters except for your ability to kiss ass, take names, and shut the fuck up. Don't think that management is making mistakes, because they aren't. And if they are, they still aren't. Or they are, but it's really the employees' mistake that have caused repercussions that made it seems like management is making mistakes when it clearly isn't. That's as simple as it gets in today's ugly corporate world. And we're still wondering why less and less employees actually aspire to move up on the rotten and foul construct that once was the career ladder. We're being taught that bosses are assholes, because we've let them be assholes for way too long, and are actually creating new, even assholier assholes to follow suit, reducing the whole concept of hierarchy to a gigantic shit-throbbing asshole that spews out pieces of diarrhea in form of inappropriate criticism and manipulative conversation from time to time. It's sad really, that the only way to prepare people for authority is by placing authority over them in order to make them feel how it needs to be done, which is sad because most authorities placed over individuals nowadays are either working but in themselves corrupt, or incompetent and insecure but very convincing. I am not even sure which kind is better, it's like choosing to get either AIDS or cancer actually, if both were still equally incurable that is.
The convincing one convinces by being big and loud, and in itself doesn't know anything, which it wants to cover up, making a very large impression on its subordinates and thereby training them to be incompetent but convincing as well. The corrupt one, on the other hand seems to be working flawlessly and is usually more than knowledgeable in its field of expertise, but alas, has chosen to be controlled by those with money and/or the lack of moral fiber to blackmail, meaning that its subordinates are trained effectively in being seemingly perfect but constantly enriching themselves by less-than-reputable means. And that is the kind of education that was being dropped on our ancestors, is being dropped on us, and will be dropped on our offspring, and there is close to nothing any of us can possibly do about it, simply because it is as usually only a small fraction of people actually realizing these adverse influences stemming from the wrong people being at the wrong end of chains-of-command everywhere. If everybody realized these issues, a whole lot of bastards would lose their jobs overnight, and an even bigger lot of decent people would get the jobs and positions they deserve, not those kind of positions that don't fit anyone involved but still require everybody to bend over backwards for them. But that is, as always, not going to happen. Not a chance.

Which is why I'll leave this topic be for now, I am getting depressed writing about it and have covered the most important points that I wanted to make, so there is no real reason to continue ranting about this.
The central theme here is omnipresent throughout most of my posts anyway, we're being enslaved and turned into mindless parodies of individuals, barely resembling decent human beings anymore, just functioning in a crooked system that turns us into crooked puppeteers only existing to ensure that our puppets will be equally crooked when they inherit the same strings given by the same masters, just equipped with new puppets, and so on. Technology is advancing but mankind is caught in a downwards spiral with at best slim chances of ever recovering. And it's been this way for so long, people that have died before I was even born had already realized it, and people that will be born after I have died will realize it again, but something is perpetuating the status quo with such a force that nothing seems to be able to throw it out of balance. I mean, it already took us a few millennia to get rid of monarchy and dictatorships, and not even close to everywhere yet. And with the stupidity and greed of people steadily increasing, I doubt that we'll see any changes for the better anytime soon. Yeah, of course, we're getting new freedoms here and there, the first nations are starting to realize what the Netherlands had already realized a century ago: Weed is relatively harmless and has the potential of becoming a gigantic cash cow of tax-related profits, so we're going to regulate the market for it. Which is fucking awesome and about damn time if you ask me, but the system in itself remains. Society remains. And that's the root of the problem, the only reason that drugs were ever illegalized to begin with. Amongst the corruption, greed and "political favors" that led there.

But that's a different story, and will not be dealt with now. Now I am just glad to have finally finished this post that I started typing yesterday evening but didn't get around to finishing seeing as I had to get up way too early today and therefore went to bed before I was done typing.

And looking back on this post, I must say that I struggled at points to keep on topic, it' so easy to stray into different areas especially on these kind of issues that all relate to my favorite central theme. But I do think I managed to get different points across than in the "Food For Thought" that concerned itself only with aforementioned subject. At least I hope so, if you thought it to be repetitive please let me know, I want to annoy, but sure as hell do not want to bore people.

Wrapping this all up though, I hope this post was enjoyable to you, and, well, I know it was pretty sinister again but it has to be for this topic, and I don't really think that you guys will mind anyway, so I'll leave you be with some music now:

Fedde Le Grand & DI-RECT - Where We Belong (Zomboy Remix)
-> Hmm, crunchy! Zomboy is a great artist, and this remix is nicely done, it has this awesome "in your face" feeling to it which I really enjoy, so all in all an amazing piece of art... Enjoy!

 Don Dibalo ft. Dragonette - Animale (Datsik Remix)
 -> This is a great song that I discovered completely by accident a couple of years ago, and I have never even heard the original to be honest, but Datsiks remix is fucking sick, so... Enjoy!

Geto Boys - G-Code
-> What a classic song, can not believe I hadn't put it on here earlier, Geto Boys are an awesome group, great artists, and amazing lyrics, all in all a great package, and this song is an epitome to the groups greatness... Enjoy!

N.W.A. - Fuck Tha Police
-> An even more classic song than the previous one, and I am even more astonished by the fact that this track was not included earlier, I mean this is one of the most famous tracks in the history of Hip Hop, and well, 'nuff said actually... Enjoy!

Cheech & Chong - WEed are the world
-> Hahaha, this is an awesome song by Cheech&Chong, mainly outlining that they're still alive, kicking ass, and smoking more weed than most of us will ever get to see! These guys are the living embodiment of every stoner to have ever lived, and are still rocking it today, big up to them... Enjoy!

AC/DC - You Shook Me All Night Long
-> classic track, and all in all AC/DC are fucking awesome and need to and will be on here a lot, seeing as they're on of the best fucking bands out there, and their music will last throughout the ages, including this great great song by them... Enjoy!

So, I am finally done with this beast of a post. It took me almost three days to actually finish this thing, and I apologize for taking such an eternity to do this, but somehow I was way too busy to actually finish it in one sitting like I usually would. And yesterday I couldn't add any music because my roommate was already sleeping and I need to turn the volume all the way up in order to properly listen to the songs I am going to dump on you, so I had to wait until this morning to actually finish this post, which is unfortunate, but gave me the opportunity to write a lot more than I had expected to and choose high quality songs over a period of almost two days, I hope you guys will appreciate it.

But anyway, this is really all I have to say for now, take care.

Peace!

Hello my dear readers,

How are you today?

The reason I am asking you this is quite simply that I am actually happy. Yes, you heard, right I am fucking happy. Like in the god damn Pharrell Williams song. I haven't been truly happy in a long time, so this is huge. 

I mean I can remember and assess most minor and major events and interactions that led to the emotion of happiness I am feeling at the moment, but today really is the culmination, or climax so to say, of all of the aforementioned, and it feels great. I can actually smile about stupid ass shit and act like a fucking moron without feeling like one at the moment, which, if you look at it the way I do is actually the downside to happiness. Being happy makes you stupid, and as fucked up as that may sound, it is still very true. Well not entirely maybe. The stupidity arising from happiness that I mean is the glorification of everything that's happening around me, which only occurs when I'm happy, e.g.:

The annoying ass bum from around the corner is asking me for change again? Great, he remembered my name, and just smells like pee today, not like pee and poo as usually! 
Some annoying asshole is spouting off stupid ass things? At least he's trying to talk about something important, let's leave him be!
People seems to be more stupid than ever? Well I am not becoming dumber, so they're probably not either, I must be imagining things!

I mean, yeah, ignorance is bliss, but why is it that happiness is almost as blinding towards reality as love? Why the fuck do we tend to put on our rose-tainted glasses every single time we have an increased release of endorphins, serotonin and dopamine in our brain? 
Maybe I just answered my own question with that, but still, although I do like being happy, I hate the fact that my surroundings become somewhat deluded as soon as I am, like I'm reaching the end of a very long drinking binge and can not be sure anymore as to whether things are as they seem, or just seem differently to me because of my temporary mental instability. 

So, the conclusion that inevitably has to be drawn is that happiness (and love for that matter, but that's a whole other topic that will get its own post at some point) deceives you into seeing the same reality with a pink distortion and a big fucking smile, making you very susceptible to people that have learned to spot that behavior and exploiting it by pretending to be feeling the same emotions that are based purely on chemical reactions within our primitive cerebrum driven by lesser desires. Hence my constant cynicism and loathing. I want to be kept in the factual world as long as possible, the emotionally tainted world view is just something that slowly grinds down my brain to a gooey mass of oh so happy thoughts and primitive satisfaction up to a point of no return, up to the point of me becoming a happily following duckling, running after an useless, old, rubber boot without ever questioning things, because - hey - after all I'm happy, right? 

But still, like hard drugs, happiness in moderation is fine. And seeing as today has been the first day for a large number of days that I am actually happy, I think I'll be alright. 
So, let's focus on that for a second: I am actually happy. How this came into being, you ask? Well, I'm not going to discuss every little detail here, this is a public platform after all, but in the past weeks a few events transpired and choices were made that all led to a pretty awesome time lately, finally culminating into the resonating happiness that I feel today. Resonating from when, isn't today the first happy day for a long time, you ask? Well, sometimes it takes a day or two to actually realize that something made you really happy, and when that realization hits you, the rose-tainted glasses magically appear and you're fucking stupid for a while. Then, luckily, these feelings slowly fade like a withering flower in order to decay and decompose, thereby becoming nutrients for a new flower and new feelings, completing the circle of... well, happiness I guess. 

Anyway, of course not only transpiring events led to my being happy, people were also a factor in that, but seeing as none of you really know my personal life, friends, etc. (and I intend to keep it that way), I will not go into any detail here. 

Yeah I know, writing a post about me being happy and then giving essentially no reasons, but only clues to reasons as to why that is, is kind of a dick move towards you guys, but if you knew aforementioned details you would understand why I am not sharing this in its entirety to a worldwide audience. Actually those of you with a functioning brain will be able to put some of the pieces together, so there should be an approximate picture of what happened forming in your minds. And if not, that's even better. 

I don't know what it all means anyway. I can be happy today, but tomorrow I will wake up once again to the sound of waves of shit that are slowly but steadily dissolving my will to fight the good fight day after day, I will once again wake up to a cynical outlook on a dying planet inhabited by a population that's slowly rotting from the inside of its own values, structures and concepts. I mean, that's what I am hearing and looking at now too, but I am alright with it, i.e. I ignore it, simply because I feel too damn happy to care about anything else at the moment, for the time being. 
But I know that that will change soon enough, so I am enjoying it while it lasts, while I can still ignore the constant beating against my temples caused by the same fucking waves that are trying to break my will each and every day. 

I guess what I would say summing up is that happiness is fine, happiness is fun, but try to remember what you thought about things prior to being really happy and be wary of the differences you will notice, and realize that they're just delusions created by your insufferably happy brain. 
And also that I am happy today and mildly experiencing those delusions. Just wanted to say that for the record. 

And I think I'll leave you guys with these thoughts, and, of course, as always some good music...:


Gus Black - Paranoid
-> awesome acoustic remake of the original Sabbath song, I first heard this version whilst watching "Californication", which, if you haven't seen it yet, is definitely a series worth watching, the main character is incredibly cool, and the whole storyline just has this raw, a little crazy undertone that makes the whole show amazing!

DVBBS & Borgeous - Tsunami
-> this song is not really in any genre that I usually listen to, I'd classify it as jump- or hard-style to be honest, but I am not sure about it. Anyway, I heard this song during the "Nature One" festival in 2013 and just found out its name a couple of days ago, and am now really stoked that I know it, so it needed to be shared... Enjoy!

Hobbie Stuart - Still Here (Gemini Remix)
-> I don't know 'Hobbie Stuart', or the original song for that matter, but this remix is jaw-dropping, awesome, and all in all, once again, musical excellence and genius infused into an amazing mix that manages to very heavy and very melodically beautiful at the same time, just great!!

Warron Zevon - My shit's fucked up
-> Another song taken from aforementioned series, "Californication", which essentially sums up the feeling I get every time I start recovering from a long drinking, smoking, and drug binge... "My shit's fucked up"... Great song, pretty chill actually, pretty deep here and there too, so all in all an awesome piece of music!

Keizer - Wacht
-> well, I don't speak Dutch, but from the few words I do think to understand I would say that this a representing track, and Keizer is most definitely a fucking beast when it comes to rapping... Great beat, great rap, great artist, 'nuff said!

Sinik - Une époque formidable
-> This is such a great, deeply reflecting track about Sinik's past and background, him growing up and so forth. He is all in all a rather famous rapper in France, and I have been listening to him since 2006, so I really connect a lot of memories to this track, and to him in general. Enjoy!

Guns'n'Roses - Sweet Child O' Mine
-> Amazing song, amazing group, amazing voice, amazing guitar, amazing everything, I have literally zero complaints about this song, except that it's too short maybe. Great, great track I have also listened to a lot in my past, making it somewhat special to me as well... Enjoy!

So, in a happy and positive mood for once, I'll say goodbye to all of you who actually take the time to read this! :)

Peace!

P.S.: NOT A SINGLE VOTE has gone in yet concerning the layout... Which is really not cool, it takes like two fucking seconds, please spare them to help me make this blog as interesting as possible! Thank you!!

New Layout and poll

So, after having put it off for what feels like forever, I decided to play around with the Blogger-internal "Template Designer", and, of course, directly attacked the "advanced" settings, and am actually kind of pleased with the outcome, but in my current condition that does not mean a lot, I find lots of things pleasing to look at right now.

Anyways, here's a list of the changes that have been made, although they're pretty obviously visible:

• The blog title has been changed to be green and in a font called "Rock Salt"

• The title for each post is now in red and in another font of which I can't for the life of me remember the name

• The background was changed to a cosmic kind of picture

...and that's already it!

The point of this post is to find out if you guys like the new layout, I'll furthermore add a poll to the right side once again in a desperate try to create author-reader interaction of some kind.

So, please vote, and let me know what you think :)

...and here are a few songs as usually:

AWE - Crystals
-> I am not sure if this can be classified as Dubstep, I highly doubt it to be honest, but nevertheless this is an epically melodic song that also happens to be quite trippy in my opinion... Enjoy!

Astronaut - Quantum
-> although the song itself has a bit too much of a "pop-ish" sound for my taste, it is pretty cool, and the video is great in my opinion, nicely animated and somehow fitting to the songs melodic theme, although I can't quite put my finger on why that is....

Don DaDa - Sittin' Sideways
-> "You can catch me sittin' sideways in something pretty with the ratchet on me, I stay strapped 'cause I always got a package on me..." Now this is real rap. A guy sitting on a porch and rapping. And quite awesomely at that. Kudos to Don DaDa, hope he gets signed sometime soon!

Bobby McFerrin - Don't worry, be happy
-> once again a song that is falsely being attributed to Bob Marley, but it was sung by Bobby McFerrin, whom I am not really familiar with, but this song is just such a cliche-stoner-hippie-peace tune that I had to include it at some point, and, honestly, I am smiling right now because it is on :)

Don't forget to vote regarding the new layout!! The poll closing date is set to the 8th of February!

Peace!

Love it or leave it

Well, it has once again been a week since I posted. I could have figured that out beforehand though to be honest, I mean, you know me and my chronic laziness syndrome.

For this entry I have chosen to discuss the statement that can be read in this posts' title. "Love it or leave it", which is pretty much a word by word translation of the title of a German rap song, but it's the message I will discuss and not the song itself, although it is pretty great, I might include it in the usual list of songs at the end of the post.

So, what do I mean by "love it or leave it"? It's quite simple actually, the message is to either be entirely and whole-heartily involved in whatever it is you happen to be doing, or to completely let it be and concentrate on something else. The message is essentially not to do anything in a half assed fashion.
That coming from me may seem weird to those that know me personally, seeing as I am exactly the kind of person that does only the required minimum to get by, and not more. But I do that whole-heartily. I have spent my lifetime perfecting the art of comfortable mediocrity that gets me through life with the least amount of effort possible. While some might find this achievement to be questionable considering the definition of "achieving something", I beg to differ. I don't think that the term "achievement" should have a general definition, seeing as it is highly subjective. For me, an achievement is to comfortably drift through life whilst giving people the impression that I am actual valuable and contribute to whatever is going on around me. For someone else, an achievement might be to reach the very top of whatever field he happens to be in. Now, ask yourself, is one "achievement" really more of that than the other one? I don't think so.

But I am getting lost in my ramblings again. Back to the topic.

The issue with doing something "just a little" (and for once I am not talking about psychoactive substances although this sentence might elicit that impression...) is that it either crumbles under outside pressures that set expectations higher than achievable by half assing, or that it becomes too boring and dull to be bearable at some point, but at that point the opportunity to actually get completely implicated in the action in order to make it interesting has usually already been missed.
"But is that not totally contradictory to what you said about your own way of drifting through life?" Nope. You didn't listen. Go and re-read the previous paragraph. I am completely involved in staying at just the same level as the bar for having mediocre success is set, which is enough for me. I don't get my personal feelings of success from getting the perfect job with great pay, or from getting high grades. My personal feeling of success kicks in when all that bullshit is done and I can finally relax and just devote my time to leisure. And everything else are just means to achieve exactly that - being able to chill without having to worry about some fucking shit that I don't even want to think about but am constantly compelled to by the usual forces.

The point I am trying to get across is probably that you should define for yourself what you really want, what your personal feeling of achievement consists of, and work towards that. With everything you got. But don't stumble around life not even remotely knowing what you're trying attain by doing what you're doing. I used to do that. I went to school, heck, even when applying for university I was just doing it because "that's how it it is - you go to school, get your diploma, and then go on to study". That had been drilled into my head by every person of authority that ever "guided" me. You have to work to pay your bills, and in order to work you need to be educated, and in order to be educated you need to go to university, etc. But all this dull, bullshit routine should not be the goal in itself. It should be a mean to give you the financial and social stability to get utterly fucked up into another dimension on weekends. It should be the norm that you defy by working within, but living without. It should not be the reason you get up in the morning. The reason to get up should be the fact that once the work is done you can come home and finally do what humans do - escape this dreaded reality of conforming we have created for ourselves, our own personal little matrix.

Damn me and my racing thoughts, went off-topic again at some point there.

Anyways, I think I managed to convey the general outline of what my thoughts are on this subject. I mean in the end, you're all going to do whatever you want, and, as you know me, I fully endorse that. But if you're going to do whatever it is you're going to do - at least really do it. Get completely immersed in your actions. Love what it is you want to do. Love it. Or leave it, but then find something - we all need something that we love, something that gives us the strength to face the painfully fake world out there. Everyday.
And don't forget that leaving it is the option for actions you can't get fully involved in, but bear in mind that in order to be entirely entangled in what you love you have to create the means for doing so, sometimes by dull, relentless tasks you loathe. But as long as it serves the cause of leading to something that you pursue out of sheer enthusiasm you can endure it.

So, if you're going to take action - love it or leave it. That's all there is to it.

And with this, and some music, I'll leave you be for now.

Genetikk - Liebs oder lass es (feat. Sido)
-> this is the aforementioned German rap song that inspired today's entry, and the crew that made this gem is one of the few German rap artists that seriously care about rap and Hip-Hop as a culture, and they have lots of talent and skills, and albeit having lots of comedic texts, do practice the apparently lost art of social criticism and sarcasm within their music, which is great!

Kid Ink - Hell and back
-> I have very close to zero knowledge about Kid Ink himself, but I know that this song is fucking awesome, and I figured since this is a blog to promote good music anyway... Enjoy :)

Hopsin - Sag My Pants
-> Oh god, did I post this already? If so please smite me in the comment section, I am soo unsure about this at the moment... Anyway, Hopsin is fucking amazing, raw and pure talent concentrated in one MC, real, good ol' fashioned Hip-Hop music with great and funny lyrics, check out some of his other stuff, too!

Ice Cube & Snoop Dogg - Go To Church (feat. Lil' Jon)
-> Awesome song, two of the best MCs out there together yields great results! And Lil' Jon gets paid millions for screaming a few words... I mean seriously, his "part" consists of "You scared, you scared, you scared, motherfucker, you scared" and he assists in the hook. And that's it. But I'm not here to bash Lil' Jon or this song! I like this song! A lot!

Metallica - Master Of Puppets
-> maybe the most cliche metal song I could come up with, but definitely one of the finest pieces of music ever recorded, the solos, the riffs, the singing, the baseline, the drums, all perfectly joint in a melodic, yet wild, paradise of musical excellence! Awesome!

Jimi Hendrix - Purple Haze
-> why, yes, this song exists! And it is a great, very trippy song about the most psychedelic ganja in existence, and elicits exactly that kind of feeling! And, well, musically, I can only say that this is Jimi Hendrix - THE Jimi Hendrix. I think that speaks for itself.

Bon Jovi - You give love a bad name
-> yeah I know, I know... But this song is fucking great, and anyone telling me their head doesn't automatically start moving rhythmically when this starts playing is lying, simple as that! Great tune!

Cypress Hill - Insane in the brain
-> "Insane in the membrane.... Insane in the brain, yo! Insane in the membrane... Left insane, got no brain!" Such an awesome song! I love Cypress Hill and everything about them, and this song is by no means an exception!

Well, I hope you enjoyed today's entry. It was a bit on the lighter side compared to other things I've posted, don't you think?

Peace! 

Wow...

... I have actually completely forgotten to post for almost an entire month, I mean, I know I said I wouldn't update regularly but god damn, an entire fucking month? And the worst part is that I am the only one to even have noticed, meaning that this blog is obviously not getting the attention I think it should, but, whatever, this has become more of a way for me to vent and kill time anyway, so... yeah...

Be that as it may, I was browsing though the "UKF Dubstep" YouTube channel and whilst getting my fucking brain blown out of my skull due to the sheer overload of awesomeness I realized that I had gone back to posting these songs on my Facebook page, which is something I did not want to do anymore seeing as I have this blog to do so; this realization made me navigate away from Facebook without posting the song I was just listening to and I started typing this entry without having chosen a topic or even having the slightest clue about the content I want to cover today, meaning that this is going to be extremely random, but I guess I might manage to get some sort of structured thought process in here after all.

So, it is the season of joy and understanding, Christmas... While I generally do not have a problem with holidays, and this one is no exception, I have to say that I am getting sick and tired of this fucking argument about whether one should say "Merry Christmas" or "Happy Holidays" in public settings that keeps coming around every single god damn year. I mean, seriously people, what is your fucking problem?
(Before I continue, a quick FYI: I tend to say "Happy Holidays" when it comes to strangers, because you can never know if they're not Jewish or one of those hyper-sensitive atheists that are like "Merry Christmas??? Are you trying to push your beliefs on me you ignorant cunt??", but that's just like, my opinion, man...)
Why is it always such a big fucking deal? I mean, yeah, church and state are separated, so some people take that as an argument as to why public organizations and such should not be allowed to use "Merry Christmas" for promotional purposes or similar public activities, but by that logic, why the fuck should we be allowed to have holidays around Christmas time then? Wouldn't New Years suffice? But New Years is somewhat religious too, ain't it? I mean we base the way we count our years on the alleged birth of someone we can not be even sure existed and no one complains about that, so why complain about a harmless, friendly "Merry Christmas"?! I believe that you see what I am getting at, this argument can also be turned the other way round, saying that religion is such a big part of our culture so banning the phrase "Merry Christmas" from public settings isn't right either, blah blah fucking blah.... In the end what it all comes down to is people trying to hinder other people from saying what they want, and I do believe that in most democratic constitutions or similar pieces of paper something called, uhm, the "freedom of speech" is at least mentioned somewhere, making this whole argument nonsense, seeing as you have to allow people to say whatever the fuck they want (as long as it doesn't incite harm to society and does not impair other peoples rights imho), including "Merry Christmas", which is just really NOT A BIG FUCKING DEAL GOD DAMN IT!

I am having fun with this topic as you can see, Christmas always gets me nicely pumped up to rant about various things, which is not only due to the fact that I am a cynical asshole with no aspiration to see the good things, but also due to those fucking Christmas decorations, and markets, and music, and carolers, and all of these little things that make the holidays so enjoyable to some... To me they're more like the offspring of Satan (no this is not a typo), two filthy prostitutes and some sort of demonic hell-spawn wearing a red fucking costume! I have to admit. when the whole thing starts I am in rather good spirits, I even catch myself whistling along to some stupid Christmas song sometimes, but as soon as the second day of this madness is upon us I have already completely lost all spirits and am just dragging myself through the hellishly bright, annoyingly happy streets filled with people that seem to want to infect me with their totally uncalled for happiness, carolers that want to sing the same fucking tunes over and over again every single year, slowly lulling mankind into a buying frenzy that it only awakes from sometime in January to then realize that money is tight now, because the decorations and shit that were already at home weren't enough, no, new stuff had to be bought as soon as the first fucking snowflake fell to the ground at the same time as all Christmas ornaments were suddenly transported to our realm from hell. Yes, I love holidays, and, yes, I like spending a nice quiet evening sitting around the Christmas tree with my family, but I could decapitate, revive, rape, blow up and then stab every single human being walking around the streets at -10 degrees (Celsius) with a moronic smile on their god damn faces holding three shopping bags full of, well, expensive garbage whilst singing some fucking generic Christmas tune like "Last Christmas" or fucking "Jingle Bells"!! Here is the official rule that people need to get drilled through their skulls with a fucking jackhammer:

All generic Christmas songs can be sung only ONCE every year or Santa will not deliver presents but start shooting shit up!

So, after having now successfully shown all of you the annoying side of Christmas, let's get real for a second here:
This is a great time of the year that you should use to cherish with those close to you, not only receive but also give, and maybe even take a second to go do a good deed, buy a homeless guy a sandwich and a blanket or something, I mean, we can all afford iPads and all kinds of expensive BS for ourselves and our families, so why not do a little something to people that can not even afford a place to stay and have to spend the season of joy and understanding outside, alone, in the cold and harsh winter nights. Christmas is not about buying presents and singing annoying-ass songs, it is the one fucking time in the year where we're supposed to act selfless and not selfish, and many seem to have forgotten that, which is really sad and really sickens me!

So, in that spirit, I wish all of my readers happy holidays and/or a merry Christmas, I hope that you all have some special people in your lives to enjoy it with!

Peace :)

....and here is the music:

Flux Pavilion - Hold Me Close
-> as you guys should know by now, I fucking love Flux Pavilion, and this is another amazing piece of music that will destroy your speakers and leave you staring at a wall with a blank stare for an hour or so before your brain is able to process what just happened... Enjoy!

Flux Pavilion - Freeway
-> Flux again, but this time a really really chill song, I could listen to for hours with my eyes closed just contemplating the thought of being alive... Gives me goosebumps every time... Just awesome!!

Flux Pavilion feat. Steve Aoki - Steve French
-> And one more Flux song, this time with Steve Aoki, of whom I am not a huge fan, but this song is pretty great and the video is so trippy, I freaking love it, looks to me as if they just dropped a little acid, drew what they saw or thought, and then made a video to it that will blow your mind if watched high ;)

Sonis & Stratagem - Jinglestep
-> Ok, I now I have made my opinion on generic Christmas tunes very clear above, but here is the exception: sick fucking dubstep remixes of said songs!! And although this one takes a while to get in and gets kind of weird in the middle, I still think it's pretty cool and the drops are just insane...

Ice Cube - Gangsta Rap Made Me Do It
-> I have no clue why I didn't put that one here earlier... Ice Cube is one of the best out there, and this song is fucking awesome... 'nuff said!

Yellowman - We WIsh You A Reggae Christmas
-> I know that this is not a particularly well thought-out reggae remix of the song, but it's a god damn reggae remix, so it just had to be in here, and if you don't like it, well, there is nothing you can do about it being here, so just enjoy it :)

Billy Talent - Burn The Evidence
-> no relation to Christmas, but I really like that song, it has got its emotional moments, it has got its angry moments, and the lead singers voice is just fucking amazing...

So, this concludes this entry, I hope there was some music that you liked in today's selection of songs :)

Oh and P.S.: The vote on whether or not I should change what I'm doing ended with two people being for an increased amount of wisdom and two being for keeping up what I've been doing so far, so no big changes will be made by me, big thanks and shout out to the four people who took the time to vote, which only takes a few second, but apparently that's more time than most people want to spend, making polls like this a thing of the past...

Food For Thought #2

Firstly, seeing as I have not received any feedback whatsoever, I'll just leave the SoundCloud Widget on here for now, simply because it does not seem to be disturbing anyone and I personally like having some minor form of promotion for my music on here as well.

Secondly, it's the end of the month, so this is the last post for November, meaning that I had to make it a "Food For Thought", seeing as you should always finish a month being a little wiser than when it started in my humble opinion, and this is the perfect way to do so.

So, thirdly, have you ever thought about the role the government should play and the duties it should perform compared to the role it actually plays and the actions it actually takes. I believe that there is a huge discrepancy between them, and believe it to be a bad one. "Democracy" means that the people should be governed by the people, that we, as the people, should be protected by the government and its organs, and that it should serve us. Do we see anything like that?
Well, to some extent, yes. We are all eligible to vote, we have the right of human dignity, supposedly complete freedom of speech, and the authorities can not arbitrarily make decisions. At least on paper we have all of these rights and freedoms. But if we truly do, why is it that people that do not pose a threat to society, that have at best committed victim-less crimes, are put together in a confined space with murderers, rapists, and other violent, bad human beings? Why is it that as soon as something is declared a "matter of national security" basic human rights are being overthrown, people just disappear, and privacy is suddenly of no concern? How is it that a state within the state in form of secret services is being allowed without anyone seeming to mind? What is the exact amount of innocents that have been kept in Guantanamo Bay for decades, tortured and degraded?
These atrocities are not something that happens far away, somewhere in the Middle East. These atrocities are not the drug-induced fantasy of some cooked up conspiracy theorists. These atrocities have often been confirmed, and we were told that "no one knew" or that it would be "dealt with" and promised that these atrocities would be stopped forever. But, what surprise, a few months later we have the next big scandalous discovery, and the same thing repeats itself.
And, the ironic, and sad, thing about it is that a lot of the criminal, a lot of mafia, even a lot of terrorist markets and funds are essentially being protected by the government. How you ask? Quite simply by the prohibition of mind-altering substances. Remember when alcohol was forbidden in the early 30's? The reason it was re-legalized rather quickly was that the ban resulted in a violent, mafia-controlled black market that quickly spiraled out of the governments control.
Now imagine letting such a market grow over decades, giving it the right nutrients in form of trying to force abstinence on citizens and suppress their free choices; imagine this market to be the exclusive source for substances that lots of people enjoy, or in some cases even need medicinally, and further imagine this market to be protected by laws that forbid the customers to purchase their goods elsewhere whilst not regulating the existing vendors, thereby preventing the possibility of education, safety, quality and protecting minors, essentially allowing easy access to possibly laced, and therefore deadly substances to everybody.
A dystopian fantasy you may think, but, alas, unfortunate reality it is. Above-mentioned problems are all effects of the international regulations for narcotics, and could be solved or at least lessened by regulating the existing market and thereby pulling out the rug from under the mafia and other criminals, essentially stealing their customers. And the funds that are nowadays being wasted on ineffective police work could be spent on prevention, education and rehabilitation.
Of course I am not saying that by doing so all the crime and violence in the world would stop, people will always find some stupid-ass reason to bash each other's heads in, but it would definitely be a first step towards a more peaceful planet. I mean, who does the government even think they are, telling people what they can and can not put into their bodies? Our 'protectors'? Then why am I allowed to poison myself with ethanol and nicotine whilst eating rat poison? All perfectly legal. It just does not make sense. At all.
Furthermore, I believe that by just saying "no, that's bad, you are not allowed to do that", mind-altering substances become even more attractive, especially to teenagers, because the things that are forbidden and taboo are always the most fun during puberty, we've all been there and know this to be true, so why give them the incentive and ban those substances even for adults?
I do not believe that to have any logical basis. I know that the actual decision of making alcohol and cigarettes legal whilst prohibiting everything else was made arbitrarily with close to no scientific evidence to support these decisions.
And, again, the government is supposed to protect and serve the people, and it is pretty much doing the exact opposite by allowing an existing market to be controlled by thugs and gangs.

So this was today's "Food For Thought", a tad more controversial than the first one in my opinion, but an important topic nevertheless, so tell me what you have to say to that? Do you feel like I feel? Do you see what I see? Can you no longer sit by as your government strips away more and more freedom? Do you feel like the world, and humanity, is heading down a dark path?
Or do you think differently? Do you think I am misinterpreting or misjudging? Do you have a different proposal altogether of how to address above-mentioned issues?
Please feel free to use the comment section to share your thoughts :)

This essentially concludes today's "Food For Thought", following are the usual YouTube links to, as usually, good music:

Juventa feat. Erica Curran - Move Into The Light (Koven Remix)
-> not the best song of the genre, definitely one of the weaker ones compared to those in my other posts, but still a good song, and it somehow conveys this struggle for freedom to me in a way I can't quite put my finger on, so it has to be here, and it's far from terrible, still very worth listening to!

Sido feat. Genetikk & Marsimoto - Maskerade
-> very new German rap by the artist that actually introduced me to the entire genre, it was because of his music that I even started getting into the whole Hip Hop thing, so he is a big idol for me, I'm a huge fan, and this is a song from his newest Album called "30-11-80", and had to be put here because it is fucking awesome.

Dub FX - Fly With Me
-> Dub FX is fucking amazing, making all of his songs with nothing but the sounds he can make with his mouth (and a pedal to record and loop everything obviously); his music is deep, relaxing and quite psychedelic, with somewhat of an "out-of-this-world feeling", really, really great artist!!

Alt-J - Fitzpleasure
-> I actually discovered this song through a T-Mobile commercial a few months ago, and it's just such a trippy song that I had to include it, especially in this post. I have no idea what genre this is, I have no clue what the bands other songs are like, I just know that I like this song, so I'm sharing it with all of you.

Green Day - Holiday
-> well, besides from representing freedom and rebellion, this song has been with me during the best times of my life, and I have always loved it, so, no matter how popular it is by now, no matter how "sell-out" and "mainstream" Green Day may be to some, I love this fucking song!!

Bob Marley - Redemption Song
-> Bob had to be in this blog at some point, and where better to put him than below a post concerning itself with freedom, which is a big factor in Marley's songs and life, and this particular song definitely fits perfectly. One Love!!

Lowkey - Obama Nation
-> talking about freedom, equality and the role of the government, America is of course always the best negative example to give for these three topics, and Lowkey here expresses everything that is wrong with that country of extremes founded by a genocide better than I possibly could, so just listen to the song!! Oh and of course huge props to lowkey for speaking up, and for being a pretty great rapper!!

Well, the "Food For Thought" turned out to be rather depressing once again, but, well, that is the input I get from the world, and, contrary to what math teachers will have you believe, a double negative does not make a positive if you catch my drift. Anyway, I hope that some of you can relate to the topic, that it was an enjoyable reading experience for all of you, and, of course, that you liked today's selection of songs!

Peace!